- Transcript of Pete and Ben's appearance
on THE MERV GRIFFIN SHOW
December 3, 1971
Barbara Sharma (from Laugh-In)
- Merv Griffin: You know they all love
- Joe Flynn: Sure... oh, I made them what
they are today, I think. (laughter)
- Merv Griffin: They're the ones that
gave him the dollar...for that appearance. How was he, Ben, was
- Ben Murphy: Oh, he was so funny. We
were straight men for a week for him. You know every other word
that came out of our mouths, Joe had a c(omeback)...
- Joe Flynn: It was supposed to be a serious
- Ben Murphy: You know it wasn't.
- Joe Flynn: I was the undertaker.
- Merv Griffin: Was he... did he say caustic
and rotten things when the camera was off, like he does to me?
- Pete Duel: We all do that to him, man.
We had Rory Calhoun, and Jack Kelly, Paul Fix, Joe...
- Joe Flynn: A pretty wild (bunch)...
I'm surprised people didn't complain about the ethnic outrageousness
of that show. We had a guy named Murphy, one named Calhoun, one
named Kelly, one named Clint, kind of a... And no fights... no
- Pete Duel: "Hollywood Bob"
Pratt saved us.
- Ben Murphy: "Hollywood Bob"
and his belt! (laughing)
- Pete Duel: Bob Pratt is a young actor
at Universal now, he's a *very* good actor, and he played a...a...
kid with a big southern accent. And this you know, this... really
doing it *way out* as far as he could, it was beautiful. And
he wore this... he made this big leather belt with stars on it
and everything and it said "Hollywood Bob" on the back.
He goes around putting everybody on, man... it was beautiful...
- Joe Flynn: (Good job,) I've always admired
Peter Deuel, I find Ben to be kind of a snotty kid. (laughter)
- Joe Flynn: He's a hippie alright. Take
some acting lessons and beat it. You know where, ah.
- Merv Griffin: Hit him, Ben! Don't let
him talk to ya like that!
- Ben Murphy: We've been through this.
- Joe Flynn: Where Ben works at Universal
Studios, they have a head of new talent out there named Monique
James. Nice, nice lady.
- Ben Murphy: Don't blame it on Monique,
it's not her fault.
- Joe Flynn: And she goes around to, ah,
different gas stations... (laughter)...and car washes.
- Merv Griffin: And hires the kids?
- Joe Flynn: Murphy does a nice job on
her windshield. Now Ben did a hell of a job on (her)! (laughter)
- Joe Flynn: She signed him to a seven
- Merv Griffin: You haven't done her windshield
yet, have you, Joe?
- Joe Flynn: No, no. (inaudible)
- Merv Griffin: Do you guys get along?
- Pete Duel: Yes.
- Merv Griffin: I don't mean that to be
facetious, but I mean is it very difficult to work in a series?
- Pete Duel: Yes.
- Ben Murphy: Really, yeah.
- Merv Griffin: Do you ever complain about
- Ben Murphy: Ah...
- Pete Duel: Not to each other.
- Ben Murphy: Yes, we do.
- Merv Griffin: Look it, folks, now watch,
I... I could really cause trouble here, watch...
- Pete Duel: No, we do, we do very well
Ben Murphy: Peter, uh...
- Pete Duel: The only thing he gets...
he gets... mad...
Ben Murphy: Peter, uh
- Pete Duel: About... my smoking and I'm
sitting in front of him and he's always... The wind is always
blowing towards him.
- Ben Murphy: No matter where Peter sits,
the wind blows the smoke in my face and I don't smoke, you know.
- Pete Duel: (yawns audibly)
- Ben Murphy: so I go "PETER!".
It's, ah, two seconds before we're on the air and then he flicks
it off and I'm going [coughs twice to demonstrate] as the take
- <Joe Flynn/Merv Griffin schtick prior
to commercial break>
- (upon return from break, guest panel
- Merv Griffin: Now when, when you, you
don't get along... (laughter continues during Merv's question)
- Joe Flynn: Why don't we hit him with
- Merv Griffin: Go ahead, Ben, let it
happen... it's alright!
- Ben Murphy: Joe, on the weekends, retires
to his estate behind the big iron gates and I sometimes wonder
what's going to happen if that electronic gate doesn't work and
you can't get in or can't get out.
- Joe Flynn: Can't get out! I'll never
be heard from again!
- Merv Griffin: Do they have you behind
big iron gates on weekends, Joe?
- Joe Flynn: Yes, they do... it's called
the Menninger Clinic! (laughter)
- Merv Griffin: When you don't get along,
do, do you then go to your agents and complain and then the agents
go to the producer and...
- Pete Duel: We don't have that... We
don't have a big problem with each other.
- Merv Griffin: You don't pal around together
- Pete Duel: Well, we're together eleven
hours a day, five days a week! Week after week after week after
week, yeah, so you know...
- Ken Howard: I like the show, because,
ah... I saw the last one they had with the swindle, the gentle
swindle, you know which I love. They fix it up so that they can
get away in the end with the money and then it's still righteous,
you know. I love that! That's great writing. (laughs) That's
- Merv Griffin: But it... For anyone who
might not have seen it, it's an intersting, ah, story line. I
mean interesting, ah... the amnesty you have for one year but
nobody knows it, right?
- Pete Duel: Yeah, nobody. And now it's
been changed, it's not one year anymore, it's just, uh, for awhile.
- Ben Murphy: Because we made it for a
- Merv Griffin: (That's the problem) The
Fugitive had, I mean he had to keep running for years and
- Pete Duel: Well, uh, what's his name,
uh... Bo(b), Roy, I'm tired... Roy Huggins, our producer. I just...
I forget my own name and Ben's too, so don't, don't take offense.
Roy has a... a theory about this, he, uh, believes that the,
uh... what was that show that, uh... [snaps fingers] that Italian
kid? [host and guest interject to assist] Run for Your Life...
Ben Gazzara... uh, did Run for Your Life, at the end of
three years they went into their fourth season, the ratings just
went [downward whistle]. And no one could figure out why they
just started to go out the window and it was because at the beginning
of the first year they said the man had three years to live and
the three years was up and people just started turning it off
subcounsciously. [Electra's note: The premise of RFYL was that
the man had two years to live, not three. Pete was correct about
the run of the show, it was cancelled after three years.]
- Joe Flynn?: [off mike] He was gonna
- Pete Duel: It was said he was going
to die in three years and that was it. So, we've got amnesty,
it's sort of open now, we don't know what's happening, it might
not be a year, it might be longer, y'know what I mean? Yeah,
it's too bad.
- Merv Griffin: Are either of you married?
(long silence then audience laughter)
- Pete Duel: Not...
- Merv Griffin: Are *either* of you married?
- (both men start to answer simultaneously)
- Merv Griffin: Wait! Are you married,
- Pete Duel: No, I'm not married.
- Merv Griffin: Are you married, Ben?
- Ben Murphy: No, I'm not.
- Merv Griffin: Neither of you are married!
- Pete Duel: That's correct. I'm not married.
- Joe Flynn: You take two guys who spend
eleven hours... (audience laughter, clapping)
- Pete Duel: We don't want to hear it,
- Merv Griffin: What about you with that
all man show you used to do? Wackiest.. what was... uh,
McHale's Navy. I didn't see too many girls around there,
- Joe Flynn: Well, we had a few nurses
in and out of there.
- Merv Griffin: That was for Borgnine,
wasn't it, Joe?
- Joe Flynn: Yes, well, we had Raquel
Welch on that show.
- Merv Griffin: I didn't know that.
- Joe Flynn: Yeah, you do, you know it
- Merv Griffin: What did she play?
- Joe Flynn: A nurse.
- Merv Griffin: Ah.
- Joe Flynn: >Scales!<
- Merv Griffin: Scales? (laughter from
- Merv Griffin: Do you ever date the same
girls? (long silence)
- Merv Griffin: I really stump them with
these questions! (audience laughter)
- Pete Duel: No, um, not at the same time,
Merv! (more laughter)
- Merv Griffin: No, I... I wasn't inferring
Ben Murphy: We trade.
- Pete Duel: Hmm?
- Ben Murphy: Sure, we make... we make
private deals, don't we, Pete?
- Pete Duel: No! We don't make private
deals! AMERICA, NOW LISTEN! THIS IS RIDICULOUS! Two young fellas
who are in a TV series together, you know, of course we don't
trade off dates, Merv!! God! (audience laughter)
- Joe Flynn: He's not familiar with their
terminology... (laughter, audience & panel)
- Joe Flynn: They call it "swapping"!
- Merv Griffin: They must do the show
out in The Valley.
- Joe Flynn: Yeah, at that club out there.
(joke doesn't go over well - audience disquiet and a few boos
- Merv Griffin: Do you, Ben?
- Ben Murphy: Yes, I've... yes, we've
been known to date the same (.) lady. But only because it was
Peter's friend and then, uh, he introduced her to me and, uh...
or it was my friend and I introduced her to him.
- Pete Duel: Did you and me get together
on this? I can't remember this happening. I don't understand
what he's talking about.
- Ben Murphy: [addressing Pete] I'll tell
you after the show. It's happened.
- Joe Flynn: When your producer sees this
and hears you refer to him as "What's His Name"...
- Merv Griffin: A word from your local
station. ... you won't be working together anyway! (commercial
- Merv Griffin: Happiness on, uh, fourteen
feet is the way one publicity man described the group that you're
about to meet, made up of five boys and two girls they happen
to be, uh, brothers and sisters and, uh, you're going to love
the sound they all make together. Now, uh, this show is on right
now, it's approximately 20 minutes of one in the morning, but
it's very early here in LA. It's, uh, 3 am in the morning [laughter
from audience]... no, no it's, um, 6.. uh... 10 after 8, and
uh, it's not bedtime yet for these kids, but they'll certainly
not be allowed to watch *this* show. Their first appearance on
national television... The Rhodes Kids!
- (music break missing)
- [Note by Electra: If my memory is correct,
there's possibly a segment missing here where Merv questioned
Pete and Ben about how they spent their time off, Pete answering
that he spent most of his at home. This would have been due,
in part, to his driver's license being suspended as a result
of his DUI conviction, although it wasn't mentioned on the show.]
- Joe Flynn?: [line cut on tape] ...obscene
- Merv Griffin: THAT WAS IT! You MAKE
obscene... no, no you GET obscene phone calls.
- Pete Duel: No, I get 'em, Merv. Had
some (good) ones, too.
- Merv Griffin: Have you had good ones?
- Ken Howard?: Mmmm...
- Pete Duel: Ahhh... [as if he's about
- Barbara Sharma: Is that why you stay
- Joe Flynn: Wouldn't you?!
- Merv Griffin: Ben?
- Ben Murphy: I don't want to talk about
- Joe Flynn: I'll give out your number
on the air right here.
- Ben Murphy: You don't know my number.
- Joe Flynn: Oh, that's what *you* think...
Pete gave it to me! (laughter)
- (break on tape)
- Male guest: [off mike] The Attorney
General's been here?
- Pete Duel: What *his* act like? (laughter
and a few howls from audience)
- Merv Griffin (?): Obedience. He sits
down and signs (inaudible).
- Ben Murphy: You know what I wish they
would show on that show [Laugh-In]... I, I saw it in one
of the green rooms when they were rehearsing it. The rehearsals
are incredible, I mean the outtakes.
- Barbara Sharma: They cut a real lot...
- Pete Duel: very funny